I have been feeling suicidal for about a year now but I doubt I’m ever going to do anything really drastic because I am too much of a coward to do that.
I just want people who have teenage kids that they really need to talk to their kids because 99% of the time, they know shit about their kids.
All I am asking is to just talk to them before it’s too late.
Take my Mom, for example. She has no idea that I’m depressed, that I cry myself to sleep every night, that I think about death every hour of every day, that I have this huge anger/hatred toward the world, etc. She knows nothing. I want to run away but I’m afraid of where I’ll end up. I’m just so sick of school, and the people in it, and everything surrounding it. I’m just not good at school and I hate feeling constantly judged by people who are smart.
Ah, I’m getting off the topic. So many kids are depressed and most people don’t even know about it. I think about my funeral a lot. I see myself in a black dress, with blue flowers everywhere. My Chemical Romance is playing in the backround. There’s a little board of pictures on the side and a little discription of my uneventful life.
My mom used to say that my dreams are realities because I used to dream of what would happen. I’d dream of a death, or I would have something happen in my dream and it would happen to either me or someone else. In my dream, I am a teen. Will this be my future in the near future? Or someone elses? Or could it just be a dream? I do not know, though I wish I knew.
